Suckers
by dexteritys
Summary: It's the team's day off and they decide to spend this beautiful summer evening on the beach. I mean honestly, how chaotic can it get? This story includes truth or dare, scary stories, and an evil cat. If you hate laughter and all the good in the world, don't read this. Completed Oneshot


**Although I would love to say I that I take responsibility for everything... I don't. I will never own young justice or Batman or any of the characters. Blah, blah, blah, REVIEW! **

beep. beeep. Beeeep. BEEEEEEPPPPP!

"OH SHUT UP!" the red head cried, only half awake. He lifted his tired head to the annoyance known as his alarm clock and cursed colorfully.

BEEEEEPPPPPPPPPP! BEEEEEEEPPPPPP! BEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

A hand slapped down onto the devilish device but still it continued to freak out. Wally buried his face into the pillow as he repeatedly smacked the object. "Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up..." he mumbled each time his hand hit the clock.

! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

"SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP!" Wally continued to cry hopelessly.

Just then, a green arrow streaked across the room and impaled the poor clock. It exploded in a bright flash and smoke rose off the dead alarm clock. Wally yelped (in a manly way of course) and looked up to see a very unpleasant sight. He screeched in horror at the ugly blond standing in his room.

Artemis stood at the door way of the ginger's messy room with a scowl on her face and a glare in her eyes. Her hair was matted and frizzy in a messy bun. She was wearing a purple tan-top that was WAY too short and only came up to her belly button. She was also wearing purple poco-doted pajama pants and she was PISSED.

She glared even harder at the speedster and said in a forced calm voice, "Wally, do you mind telling me WHY THE HELL YOU'RE STUPID ASS ALARM WOKE ME UP AT 6:00 FREAKIN O' CLOCK?"

Wally shrunk down in his covers and said, "Uhh... good morning?"

**BREAKLINE**

Robin jerked awake at the sound of Kid flash's scream. He smiled evilly, got out of bed, stretched, picked up his sunglasses, and got ready for the day.

"Huh," Robin murmured to himself, "I guess rigging Wally's alarm clock finally woke him up at a reasonable hour." He smiled again and crackled wickedly as he strolled down the hallway of Mount Justice to get some breakfast.

***In the kitchen***

Artemis walked in happily to the kitchen. Kaldur was already seated and with a polite smile he said, "Good morning, Artemis. How did you sleep last night?"

She smiled back and said, "Like a log."

"I didn't think logs slept?" said a voice from the doorway.

M'gann, who was cooking, or in this case, burning, looked up and smiled happily saying, "Good morning, Conner! I have learned that when someone says, 'I slept like a log' they are using an expression comparing their sleeping habits to an immobile object!"

Superboy walked into the room mumbling a "Whatever" as he sat down in the entertainment room. M'gann frowned softly, but Artemis nudged her saying, "He'll come around. Don't worry."

M'gann then smiled joyfully and continued burning the remnants in the toaster. A noise was made in the hallway and Robin turned his gaze to the small sound. Wally sluggishly walked into the room with a messed up hair style.

The Boy Wonder smiled and said, "'Mornin' sunshine!"

Wally glared half-heartily at his friend and grumbled something about evil clocks and PMSing women. Robin's smile grew wider and he folded his arms in content. Wally then grabbed all the food he can hold and stuffed it down his throat as fast as he can.

"Hey, guys," Robin said, getting the attention of the entire team, "How about we go to the beach today! Batman told me there weren't going to be any missions and it can be a great team bonding exercise!"

M'gann smiled widely and said, "I think that's a great idea! I've heard a lot about earth girls getting tans!" She yelped happily and jumped up and down.

Kaldur looked pleased and said, "I would like to swim out in the ocean today as well."

Superboy just shrugged as if to say, 'I either don't want to do it, or don't give a damn.'

Artemis cheered up a bit and thought about pushing Wally in the current. Then he'd be swept away from her life forever. She smirked wickedly at all the ways she could kill him with just sand and water.

Wally grinned, jumped into the air and cried, "Well what are we waiting for? Come on, Beautiful, I'll rub some sunscreen on your back." He winked at her while M'gann shifted uncomfortably. Artemis glared daggers at Kid Ugly and left the kitchen to put on her bikini.

Robin got up to leave to his room, but not before smacking Wally on the head before he left. "Hey!" Wally protested, but left to get changed anyway.

Superboy silently got up to head towards his room and Kaldur walked out of the kitchen to change. Before he left he took a look at the sad excuse of food the Martian cooked up. "Uhh... perhaps you should pack that up for Wally. I am sure he will love your food on the beach." Kaldur said to M'gann.

The girl smiled brightly and thanked her leader for the suggestion. Then she packed her food, some chips, and floated off to her room.

**BREAKLINE BREAKLINE BREAKLINE BREAKLINE**

Young Justice all met outside on the sand. Wally was dressed in light blue trunks and flipflops. Robin had on some black trunks and his usual dark sunglasses. M'gann had her same yellow swimsuit and Superboy had plan red swim trunks. Meanwhile, Kaldur had some fishy swim trunks that Wally bought him. The speedster's exact words were, "This is so you won't feel homesick!" Kaldur sighed at the painful memory, but he wore the shorts to make Wally feel good.

They were all on the beach when Artemis showed up. She walked up towards them and Wally swore she was walking in slow motion. All eyes turned to her as she strolled up to the team.

The girl was HOTT! She was wearing a red bikini with a sea shell necklace. Her long blond hair was straightened and wasn't frizzy at all. She had a little lip gloss on and light make-up to make her eyes pop. It worked. She also had her nails painted red and a star fish ankle bracelet rapped around her foot. Not to mention her boobs were big, her ass was shaped, she had long skinny legs and flat abbs.

Robin whistled as she walked up to the team and Artemis smiled proudly. Wally could only stand there with his mouth hanging open in the oh-so-attractive fish out of water expression.

M'gann floated to her friend and started complimenting her on how pretty she looked. Then M'gann floated away to build a sand castle, while dragging along an unwilling Superboy. Kaldur passed Artemis on his way to the ocean and said, "You look very beautiful. Like a shining pearl in the current."

Artemis blushed and thanked her leader. Robin passed her next, smirked and said, "Seriously though, I guess you're feelin' aster today, huh?"

She smirked at the youngest member and said, "Yeah, I welmed." Robin smiled back and ran off to his other teammates.

When Artemis approached Wally, he was still staring at her with his mouth gaping open. She smirked and said, "What? Haven't you ever seen a girl before?"

Wally snapped out of it and quick thought of something cunning to say in his head. He looked her up and down with a disgusted expression on his freckled face and replied, "Yeah, but if you find one around here, tell me."

The archer glared and said, "You're just a stupid player."

"You're a mop."

"Jerk!"

"Pig-face!"

"Ginger!"

Wally gasped, "You take that back, you—you dumb... BLONDE!"

She glared at the speedster and said, "You're a real ass. But hey, any ass can fart an opinion." Then she walked away to go talk to M'gann.

Wally was left there with his shoulders slouched and his mouth hanging open. Robin walked up to him from behind and used his shoulder as an arm rest.

"Dude," he said, "you just got verbally bitch-slapped."

"DUDE!" Wally cried as he chased after Robin on the shore. The young boy's laughter could be heard across the ocean.

**BREAKLINE**

Young Justice was all crowed around the campfire. It was 7:00pm and just starting to get dark. They were all roasting marshmallows together in a circle. M'gann was next to Superboy who was next to Kaldur who was next to Robin who was next to Artemis who was next to Wally who was next to M'gann.

They were all sitting in a comfortable silence with no complaints from the spitfire over there when Robin perked up with a great idea. He smiled evilly and said in a creepy voice, "Who wants to hear a scary story?"

Wally jumped up and down and said, "YES!"

Kaldur nodded and M'gann looked on curiously. "I've never heard a scary story before. I hear this is what they do at campfires, right?"

Artemis nodded but still looked a little hesitant. This kid has been living in Gotham. Who knows what kind of wicked mind he has to come up with a scary story.

Robin's smile grew wider and he began his story. The fire flickered off his face, making him seem older and scarier.

"I've heard this story from Batman and he warned me not to tell a soul. But this is a special occasion. You see, there is a cave on this beach. Not the cave we live at, but a cave that holds many secrets. Secrets so dark and sinister, they would make the Joker quiver in fear.

A sweet little couple used to live on this beach. Right by the caves of secrets. They were very curious and that was bad. The wife wanted to know what was in that cave, even if it killed her. But that was to close to the truth.

"She told her husband; late one night that she was going to see what was in that cave. Since night time was the only time she wasn't working, she decided to go then. The man waited outside the cave and called out, "Good bye my sweet! Be careful! And if you ever get lost, just whistle and I'll come for you. Good luck!" And into the dark hole the beautiful women went. But little did the couple know, there was some one too who heard the man's words of safety.

"Some people say the cave has a mind of it's own. That is alive and wanted to kill everyone who enters. This was just a myth but after that night, the legend became reality. So when the woman was in the cave, she never noticed the sharp rock in front of her head before it was too late. The rock cut clear through her skin and her head rolled onto the floor of the cave.

"Just then, a bird inside the cave whistled, loud and clear. The man heard it and came running into the cave to find his lost wife.

"Sweat reflected off his face from the moon outside, and he heard a strange sound. He was looking around frantically but saw nothing. The sound came closer and closer to the poor man. It sounded like a bowling ball rolling on stone. Then, slowly rolling out of the corner of the cave walls was the head of the man's wife. It rolled until it stopped a few feet in front of the man. Her eyes were glazed and her mouth was opened in a silent scream. The man turned around just as a sharp stone, pierced his heart. Then the man fell down. His heart was still on the cave's bloody walls.

"Some who are brave enough to go into the cave now-a-days, hear voices telling them to go back. And the passengers can just make out a faint image of a man and a woman, warning them to run so they don't meet the same fate as the poor couple. But if you look closely as them, you will notice for some odd reason, the man has no heart, and the woman has no head."

Robin stopped his story and looked around at his teammates. M'gann was cowering in Superboy's arms, who was shaking like a leaf. Kaldur looked like he was going to either scream or puke. Wally and Artemis were holding each other and both were trembling with fear.

Robin crackled madly at the expressions each teenager wore. He was laughing even more when Wally and Artemis realized they were touching each other and both made gagging sounds while breaking apart quickly.

Wally shivered and said, "Man, that was messed up. Thanks for mentally scarring me for the rest of my life." He shivered again and hugged himself tight.

Conner glanced away but still asked, "T-that wasn't real was it?"

Kaldur raised his eyebrow and M'gann leaned forward. Robin shrugged casually and said, "Who knows?"

Artemis tried to pretend she wasn't scared out of her mind, but she didn't do a very good job of it. Everyone was pretty freaked out right now.

Just then, Wally screamed. Loud. But manly. Huh, yeah right. He screamed like a little girl who just saw a spider.

Everyone jumped and M'gann screamed even louder and girlier.

"WHAT IS IT?" Artemis cried.

"Some—something just crawled across my foot!" Wally whimpered.

The whole team looked at the ground to find a pair of glowing green eyes in the darkness. M'gann yelped loudly at the monster. The creature's mouth opened to show a pair of gleaming white teeth. It looked like it was smiling in a disturbing way about something.

Robin grabbed the flashlight and shined it at the creature. Everyone was expecting some horribly deformed monster about to eat them, and when the light reached it, it was a ... cat.

The black and white cat hissed at the team, sratched Wally's ankle, and ran off to a tree. Everyone sat there, frozen in shock. Robin was the first one to crackle loudly in his pixie laugh. Kaldur was next, then it was M'gann, Conner was even laughing, and Artemis was rolling around in a ball on the floor. Finally, Kid flash joined in with howls of laughter.

It took almost 5 minutes for everyone to calm down. That left them all with stomach cramps and gasping for breath.

"Dude..." Robin moaned, "I... just got a six pack."

Wally laughed even more, but winced after the pain in his side. "This... must be what it... feels like to be girl... with her period."

Artemis looked up at Wally on the floor and said, "It's much worse, trust me."

Even Conner winced and murmured a quiet, "ouch"

M'gann suddenly perked up and said, "Hey! Maybe perhaps we could play truth or dare! I hear it's custom to do it at parties and it's really fun! Right, Conner?"

"Robin explained it to me one time..." Superboy said in his stotic distance voice.

"Alright then," Wally said, jumping up. "Let's play truth or dare."

M'gann looked over and saw the beach chairs next to the table. She lifted the table up with her mind and set it over by the campfire, facing the ocean. Meanwhile, Robin finished the last of his Coke and placed it in the middle of the table. Wally, super speed, ran to get six chairs. They all sat down on the chairs.

Kaldur said, "I will spin the can." He reached over and twisted the soda can. It landed on M'gann. "M'gann," Kaldur said, "Truth or dare?"

The Martian girl thought about it for a moment but then said, "Truth."

Kaldur nodded and asked, "Do you like anyone as a lover?"

M'gann's eyes widened and she blushed madly. "Uhh... yes." She stammered while squirming around in her seat and stealing glances at Superboy.

Artemis smiled and looked at Wally. He had a sad expression on his face and his eyes were downcast. For a moment, the archer felt pity for the speedster. She knew what it felt like to have your heart broken. Kid flash's eyes met hers and his expression changed to rivalry. They both had a glaring contest from across the table.

M'gann reached over and spun the can. It landed on Robin and M'gann said, "Robin, truth or dare?"

Without much thought, Robin replayed with, "Truth."

M'gann, being the nice person that she is, didn't want to push on the boy's secret identity. Instead, she asked, "What is Batman's most embarrassing secret?"

That got people's attention. Wally snapped his head up and grinned at his best friend. Conner had his full attention on the Boy Wonder and Artemis leaned in closer. Even Kaldur lifted his head a bit more to hear every word.

Robin smiled and said, "I didn't think you guys would want to know. But okay. His most embarrassing secret is..." he paused for dramatic effect.

Everyone leaned in closer. Well as close as you can get with a round table digging into your ribs.

Robin was still silent which cause Wally to cry out, "FOR GOD'S SAKE MAN, SPIT IT OUT!"

Robin leaned in closer and whispered loudly for his team to hear, "Batman sings Jesse McCartney when he's in the shower."

There was a moment of silence... then all hell broke loose.

Everyone was on the floor, laughing their asses off. Even Mr. Personality over there (Superboy) was crying his eyes out with laughter. Not to mention the most respectable one (Kaldur) rolling around the ground screaming, "Dear Poseidon HAHAHAHA!"

Wally was laughing so hard, no noise came out, so he was just sitting there, clapping his hands like a retarded seal. **(A/N I got that line from Facebook)**

Even the Ice Queen (Artemis) had to gasp for breath like a dying fish. Next to her was M'gann who was holding her stomach and rolled up in a ball of laughter. "I—ahaha! I can't... believe Batman...hahaha! likes... Jesse haha McCartney!" That swept the team into a whole other fit of laugher. Yet no one noticed the dark cape in the shadows.

"What's so funny about Jesse McCartney?" a deep voice boomed. Everyone froze for about the fifth time that night. Batman—_the _Batman, was standing over the team like a disappointed mother. Or more like a scolding teacher about to eat you because you failed the math test.

Wally practically peed himself but he mustered up enough strength to screech, "It was all Robin's idea!"

Batman raised an eyebrow and the team could feel his glare burning past everyone on the beach. "I don't see Robin." He said with his voice laced with venom.

Wally's head snapped around to search for his best friend, but nothing. The whole team looked around to figure out the kid left them here! With the Dark Knight himself!

"That little... brat!" Artemis cried.

Young justice stood there, stunned to the bone as Batman gave his Batglare (or as Wally calls it, the stare from hell) and said, "I will talk to you in the morning. It's past midnight. Head back to the cave and get some rest. Tomorrow is chore day." Then the Caped Crusader took off into the night without another word.

"So much for truth or dare..." Conner mumbled as he and the team headed back to Mount Justice.

"We should have known finding out Batman's secret would result in pain." Wally complained as the rest of the team nodded along.

"This is all your fault!" Artemis cried as she slapped the stupidity that is Wally in the back of his head.

Kid flash spun to face her and cried out, "My fault?" but his voice cracked in the process and he ended up turning bright red.

Artemis sat there in silence before she cracked up and Wally lifted his head to the sky and screamed, "I HATE PUBERTY!" at the last word, his voice cracked once again, which proved his point that the world hated him and wanted to see him suffer. Artemis laughed even louder and Wally pushed her. _Hard. _ Then he took off running.

"GET BACK HERE YOU ASS!" The blonde screamed as she ran after the fleeing red head.

Kaldur sighed heavily and said good night to his team. M'gann and Superboy both headed off to their rooms, as well.

"YOU CRAZY WOMAN!" Wally shouted somewhere in the cave.

"GROW A PAIR AND FIGHT ME LIKE A REAL MAN!" Artemis' voice came back from a different section of the cave.

An eerie crackle echoed throughout the cave walls belonging to the one and only Boy Wonder. He was safely away in hiding at the moment and listening to the whole conversation. Robin smiled to himself.

"Suckers."

**Like I said, I own nothing. But I do own the cat, so yay for me ****well, reviews make me happy sooooo... REVIEW please! You bring flames, I bring marshmallows and I'm not sharing my marshmallows so no flames please! **

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